Lately I have been feeling so depressed. All I see is the negativity in my life. I don’t even want to get out of bed. Feels like I am failing at everything. I feel like I am fighting with the devil, and he is mocking me. I have been feeling so low, I know I cannot stay like this. All I can do is surround myself in prayer. I have to keep pushing forward.
I believe that the higher power has a unique plan for you and me. I believe that for whatever reason God wanted me to have Cerebral Palsy and this life. I do not subscribe to the theory that we choose who we want to before we come to earth. I think that if we got to pick our own lives; we would have completely different lives. That being said, God knows more than I do, so I will have to trust him to get me out of the mess I have made of my life.
I don’t understand why America will not put a temporary ban on flights going and coming from Africa. When you are dealing with a dangerous and deadly disease, you must contain the disease to prevent an epidemic. Health and safety trumps people’s right to travel. I understand this is a major inconvenience, but it is more inconvenient to be dead. Do you really believe that if America was the source of a potential world wide they would hesitate to keep us from going into their country.
I also believe that the CDC needs to do better research on Ebola, so they can come up with better guidelines to better understand the disease.
I feel like a complete failure, because I have done nothing meaningful in my life. I write books that nobody reads, so what is the point in doing that. Okay writing may not be my thing anymore, but what is my thing?
A few months ago I got very disgusted with triond.com and I erased my profile, because I didn’t believe that they paid a fair amount, but I decided to give them another try.
I don’t know why, but lately I just don’t have the energy to write things. I get these fragments of ideas, but nothing concrete. The fact is I’ve always had an on-again off-again relationship with writing. I hope this doubt doesn’t last. Maybe me and writing to get divorced. I hope I get out of this funk.